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monogamist.
deefarhana; yours truly

feizan.

metaphorically different.
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Friday, August 23, 2013

If you ever are in a relationship that hurts you too much, probably its time for you to let it go. It doesnt matter whether you're right or you're wrong. What matters is your feelings.

There's no point working it out when at one point of time in the future, you're gonna be reminded of what had happened in the past. What's scary about the past is that, it never really leave you. It scarred your life, and leave a mark.

So when there's hurtful words that was embedded in your mind, or painful events that ever happened and lingers in your memory.. let the relationship go. Coz you cant let go of what had happened.. it stays with you. But save your heart for a better future.


Friday, August 23, 2013



If I were to say that life is not fair, it would be an unfair judgement. Coz im pretty much lucky being born in a peaceful country with daily needs provided. I guess, im just not lucky being around people.

Since young, i've never had real friends. Sure I have friends who i can joke around with. I have friends who i can just go out and have lunch. But do I have a friend that will stand by me and listen to me when im sad? i dont have a friend that i can just give a call or a text away. I've never had one in my whole entire life.

As for my family.. We're close but its as though there's an invisible line that separates all of us. We're not united. Though im thankful i have them, there are times i wish my family would be different.

Love life? I guess.. its not even part of my destiny to begin with. There are bound to be wrongs in myself.

I feel useless all the time. Worthless. Im not worth to be a friend, a daughter and even someone's other half. There are times i felt lucky, and i was always hopeful it would last forever. But that's just my life. 21 years have passed.. and i dont even know why i was even born in this world.

I wish everyime i feel like killing myself, i have the courage to do that. Without thinking of sins and the hereafter. I wish i have that ounce of courage just to pop a bottle of pills, or slash myself. I want to leave this world. Im ready. Please take me away.


Friday, August 23, 2013